The Chillings Shards Of illusion
by Serenity-X-Garrus
Summary: A past that haunts a mother, tries desperately for her children not to remember, but what happens when one of them have dreams that are memories that were long forgotten? How could she cope with the conflicting emotions that came with realizing who she is?
1. READ BEFORE MOVING FORWARD!

HELLO EVERYONE AND WELCOME BACK! (or maybe I should be saying that to myself! XD)

So here it is! The prologue to the grand story of my Mass Effect universe!

Sorry for the long wait, school and stuff got in the way but I finally did it! Not done with it completely, but it will get done.

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Before I post it, however, I need you all to read this.

1st **I do not own any characters or anything that belongs to BIOWARE, besides the plot! **

2nd **I won't upload as often. Sorry but school started and already there is work and tests! So follow the story if you like it, love it or hate it! =D**

and 3rd** I want to provide a bit of background for this story, before there are questions. **

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This story has a family. I'm using a **Spacer** background, which means that my **Shepard's** have a mom. Yes I said **Shepard's** which means there are two.

This is sorta like a soap opera with lots of mystery and drama that will unfold **throughout** the series! Not just **this** story.

I investigated the psychological profile and there are gaps that I can use all three. To clarify:

The Skyllian Blitz - 2176

Shepard was on shore leave when the attack came and (s)he single handedly held them off and sealed the breach as (s)he waited for reinforcements. Shepard rallied a resistance force and managed to single-handedly repulse the enemy ground force long enough for reinforcements to arrive.

Akuze - 2177

Akuze was in the early stages of colonization when all contact was lost with the pioneer team. An Alliance Marine unit was then sent in to investigate, but found only the intact settlement and no survivors. When the unit camped for the night, they were set upon by thresher maws. Not knowing what they faced, the unit was slaughtered almost to the last man; fifty marines were lost, and only one made it back to the landing zone alive.

Torfan - 2178

Torfan is a small moon that served as base for criminals, mostly batarians, who built strongholds deep underground. Though the Alliance took heavy losses, the enemy was completely annihilated.

I am going to use all three because it fits the profile for my Shepard's and the story.

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I use **First Name Bases** when my Shepard's are speaking to certain characters. I use **Last Name Bases **when I am writing in third person view. Some characters will be mentioned in third person view as my Shepard's speak to them and sometimes I will use first names to get the story going. *You will see what I mean throughout the story.*

This story, although it starts **Rated PG-13**, I am going to rated it **Rated M**, for there will be dark things in my story, heavy language and sex. **Not for teens or children!** Well unless you are 18 or are mature enough to read this.

So, that is about it... Unless I can think of something else, I will post them on the chapters! But the warning will be in **every chapter** for those who read further on.

OH! and I will use different languages. **After every chapter** there will be a **Translations** part in case you didn't understand what it means.

My Shepard's speak Spanish, French and English! They _can_ speak other languages. You will know as I go along.

Turian language is Latin. So if you don't believe what I put up, Google it because that's what I did and followed the rules and sometimes Google was nice enough to completely translate it for me in Latin.

Some chapters are **really long,** so let me know if you don't like **long** chapters... which would mean that this story will have **a lot more chapters!** **  
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Ok! That is literally it! Unless I think of something else! Any questions, concerns, my box is **always** open! Please remember to **READ, RATE AND** **REVIEW! **The three "R's!"

Love, Serenity-X-Garrus


	2. Prologue

1ST - **I do not own any characters or anything, that belongs to BIOWARE, besides the plot!**

2ND -** This story, although it starts Rated PG-13, I am going to rated it Rated M, for there will be dark things in my story, heavy language and sex. Not for teens or children! Well unless you are 18 or are mature enough to read this.**

3RD - **Please remember to READ, RATE AND REVIEW! The three "R's!"**

Love, Serenity-X-Garrus

* * *

**The Chilling Shards Of illusion**

**Prologue**

_She looked at the jagged pieces of the broken mirror, float in the air. Each turn she made, it showed her face. But it wasn't her that was being reflected back. _

_Illusions…_

_It was chilling to know that each shard revealed a bit more of the mist that threatened to consume her. Like a snake in its habitat. Circling around her. Engulfing her. _

_Choking me…_

_She closed her eyes as one shard was but black, but the eyes that mirrored hers, were seen bright and evil…_

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She shook her head before she opened her eyes. She looked past her reflection and saw the Normandy. 

Her red ruby lips upturned into a smile. She had been on the Normandy countless times, but this time, it was different. 

David Anderson pleaded… well more like demanded she be his XO to the Normandy. The Alliance agreed and here she was. Waiting for the clock to strike six before she could go and see Anderson in his office. 

"Celestine!" 

Her eyes blinked as her ears twitched. She tore her eyes away from the ship to looked at the reflection of the fast approaching person. 

"Beautiful isn't she?" Asked the man to her side. 

She smiled. "That she is Jeff. That she is." 

She turned to the man who favored his left side. Jeff "Joker" Moreau. Damn best pilot in the whole Alliance fleet. Probably in the galaxy! He is a tall man, but due to his illness, he always bent forward and therefore, slouch. He always wore a cap with his military attire. 

Shepard flicked his hat. He turned to her. His sparkling green eyes staring at her with amusement. 

"Dont call me Jeff. You sound like my mother." 

They laughed. 

"Alright Joker." She smiled. "Ready to go?" She turned around and started to walk away. 

"I was born ready, Cele." He nodded as he followed her to her destination. 

"Celestine Claire Shepard!" 

She stopped once her ears registered his voice. Her heart accelerating as she turned. Her midnight blue eyes zeroed in on the bright green eyes that shone with excitement. 

"Nihlus!" She grinned and practically threw herself at him. 

He laughed. "Damn good to see you!" He embraced her. 

"Its damn good to see you too!" 

After a moment, she let go of him. Nihlus could hear her heart beat and smiled softly at her. He turned to her companion that had an uncomfortable scowl on his face, even if he tried to hide it. 

"Hey Joker." Nodded Nihuls 

"Hey Nihuls. How are you?" Jeff nodded back politely. 

"Been good. On my way to a mission." He turned to look at Shepard. 

"Always the busy bee I see." She crossed her arms over her chest. 

"Jealous?" He raised a brow plate as his mandles opened wide to give her a grin. 

She winked at him. "Maybe a little." 

They both laugh. 

"Dont tease me Cele." He smirked. "I'm suffering as it is." 

Jeff snorted. "Get in line." He grumbled. 

Shepard smirked. "You are such a flatter. Always know what to say." 

After their laughter she cleared her throat. 

"Well, it was good seeing you again. Dont be a stranger." 

"I will try not to be." He responded softly. 

Jeff and Shepard waved goodbye as they continued on their way to their destination. 

"Well, I will see you inside the Normandy, Cele." 

They stopped at a fork in the hallway. 

Shepard nodded. "Don't worry Joker." She winked at him. "You are still my number one guy." 

"Dont make promises you cant keep, Cele." He laughed as he watched her walk away. 

"Wouldn't dream of it, Jeff!" She yelled back. 

Shepard reached a door at the far end of the hallway and knocked. The door panel to the side of the door turned from red to green, allowing her permission to enter the room. 

"Sir?" She asked as she walked in and the door slid shut behind her. 

"How many times am I going to tell you not to call me sir?" The man said sternly as he looked at her. 

She chuckled. "Alright, sorry David. Didnt mean to upset you." 

He chucked with her. 

"So, whats the four, one, one?" She asked once she cleared her throat and stood at attention with her hands behind her back. 

"I need the Normandy to go to Eden Prime for a shakedown run." Said a man from the chair in front of Anderson's desk. 

The chair swiveled around. The man who was in the chair looked to be in his late forties with a scar going down one side of his face. He wore an official Alliance military cap to go with his formal Alliance uniform. His clear blue eyes soften at her appearance. 

"Hello Steven." She greeted softly. 

"How are you feeling?" Hackett asked as he got up from the chair and approached her. 

"I'm fine." She said as she followed him with her eyes. 

Hackett inspected her to see if anything else would be troubling her. 

"How are you, really?" He prodded. 

Shepard sighed. "I haven't slept well in two days." She rubbed her neck as she looked down. 

A movement caught her eye. She looked up to see Anderson approach her as well. 

"Nightmares?" Anderson asked concerned. 

Shepard grimaced before she composed herself. 

"You could say that… Though they feel more… real than anything." She said softly. 

"If you need anything, let Karin know." Hackett said as he lifted her chin to look into her eyes. 

"I will let her know, Steven." She nodded. 

"Well. Its time. We should get going." Said Anderson as he looked at his digital watch. 

Hackett removed his hand from her chin and hugged her. _"Cuidate mucho, mi Colibrí ."_ He whispered in her ear. 

All she did was return his hug and nodded. After a moment of silence, Hackett let her go. 

"Lets go say goodbye to your mother and then we can be on our way. Heaven forbid she never sees her child." Anderson chuckled. 

Shepard laughed as she turned around and went through the opened doors followed by Anderson and Hackett. 

"There you are!" 

They turned to a woman, in her early forties with clear sky blue eyes and her raven hair up in its usual bun. She also had the same formal Alliance attire like Hackett. She had her hands on her hips and her foot was tapping impatiently, waiting for them. Her voice was soft but stern. 

"Sorry Hannah, we-" 

Hannah Celestine Shepard put her hand up to stop Hackett from making excuses. She opened her arms to her daughter as Shepard went to embrace her. 

"You better be careful my _Geai Bleu._" She whispered into her hair. 

"_Ne vous inquiétez pas, je vais mère."_ Shepard replied softly. 

Hannah held her at arms length and smiled at her. Shepard smiled in return. 

"Take care of her Anderson." Hannah said sternly as Hackett and Anderson approached them. 

"You know I will. She is always in good hands." He said seriously. 

"I'm not a child you guys. I can do this. I am ready." She saluted to them and turned around. 

"She is starting to have nightmares again." Informed Hackett as he watched Shepard walk away. 

"I wish those nightmares would just disappear…" Hannah sighed softly. 

"We will have to tell her sooner or later." Anderson interjected. 

Hannah shook her head. "Lets hold on, until she at least figures it out." 

The two older men nodded as they looked in the direction Shepard went, with concern.

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Translations:

_Cuidate mucho mi Colibrí → Take good care of yourself my hummingbird. (In spanish)_

_Geai Bleu → Blue Jay. (In french)_

_Ne vous inquiétez pas, je vais mère. → Don't worry, I will mother. (In french)_


	3. Chapter 1 - The Normandy

Hello everyone!

Sorry for the long wait! With school and exams and being a wife and childishly, amusing (love you lots) husband, my day is pretty hectic.

Anyway, I want to thank those viewers who took the time to read the Prologue! It means a lot to see the number of viewers rising.

The chapters are long, not super long but enough to keep you entertained and with me not uploaded regularly (don't know when that will happen) it should make up for it!

Thank you guys again and hope you enjoy!

P.S. Let me know if you guys need me to space the paragraphs and the dialogue more... I cant tell if they are too together or just right... .

1ST - **I do not own any characters or anything, that belongs to BIOWARE, besides the plot!**

2ND -** This story, although it starts Rated PG-13, I am going to rated it Rated M, for there will be dark things in my story, heavy language and sex. Not for teens or children! Well unless you are 18 or are mature enough to read this.**

3RD - **Please remember to READ, RATE AND REVIEW! The three "R's!"**

Love, Serenity-X-Garrus

* * *

Chapter One: The Normandy

After the decontamination process, Anderson left her to go to the mess hall as he entered his captain quarters. He insisted she go and see Karin to make sure she was alright. Once she entered the med bay however, Karin was nowhere in sight. Shepard shrugged and decided to pay Jeff a visit in the cockpit. As she walked back up the stairs she felt the ship move and went straight for the relay that would take them to Eden Prime.

She felt a feeling of dread settle in the pit of her stomach. She didn't know why. She took deep breaths as she moved up the stairs and into the CIC.

'_Something is going to happen… I just know something is missing...'_ She mused.

She passed people who saluted her near the galaxy map and excused those who bumped into her. She looked out the window from the cockpit once she made it as Jeff counted down and went through the mass rely. She felt slightly queezy at the feeling of being pulled apart and being put together. She turned to Jeff once he made sure everything was alright.

"Joker, status report." Anderson barked through the comm.

"Just cleared the relay, Captain." He typed a few things. "Stealth systems engaged. Everything looks solid." He announced.

Shepard turned to the side to see Kaidan chuckling at Jeff's stiff posture. Kaidan Alenko. One hell of a biotic. She met him through a mission they went together during training. She learned some of her biotic abilities through him. Until he confessed his crush to her. Before that they became friends. After that, they drifted apart. Kaidan was a tall fellow with dark brown hair styled in a weird way with warm honey brown eyes that made any woman melt. Well, except for her.

She frowned at him slightly as Jeff ended the comm with Anderson. Jeff sighed heavily. Shepard placed a hand on his shoulder causing him to jump. He relaxed once he saw it was her.

"Jesus Cele! You cant just _do that_ to people! I could have had a heart attack which could cause my ribs to shatter at just the scare!" He said dramatically.

"Sorry Jeff-"

Jeff frowned.

"-Joker."

He smiled.

"Just saw that you were tense. Didn't meant to cause you any harm." She said softly as she grimaced.

Jeff laughed and patted her hand.

"Its quite alright. Don't worry."

She withdrew her hand and turned to Kaidan beaming at her.

"Hi." He greeted.

"Hi." She greeted back.

"How have you been?" He tilted his head to the side.

She nodded. "Fine. And yourself?"

Kaidan sighed and shook his head. "I hate this Cele."

"Hate what?" She raised a brow.

Before he could respond, Anderson came back on the comm.

"Joker! Tell Shepard to go to the comm room for a briefing." He barked.

"Aye, aye sir." Joker replied as the comm went off.

'_He wasn't angry before… was he? He was fine before we left Arcturus Station...'_

Jeff shook his head. "You get that, Commander?"

She sharply looked at him. He only used her rank when he was upset with her or when he was upset and annoyed with people.

"I wonder if something went wrong with the mission already. He sounds angry." Shepard turned around.

Jeff caught her hand before she left. She stared at him.

"The Captain is always like that when he talks to me." Jeff said as his eyes conveyed an apology.

"Can't possibly imagine why." Mused Kaidan.

Shepard sighed and nodded as Jeff let her go and she continued down the cockpit and overheard a discussion between Chief Engineer Adams and Navigator Charles Pressly. She chatted with Pressly for a bit. She grinned once she left Pressly and saw the doctor.

"Dr. Chakwas!" She hugged to older woman.

"Hello, Shepard. How are you?"

Dr. Karin Chakwas. A very important person in Celestine's life. She became a mother of sorts to her when Hannah wasn't around. She was a woman in her late forties with warm green eyes that she reserved for Celestine and her brother. Celestine loved the way she took good care of her hair, always styling it in her favorite side bobbed style. She had slight wrinkles around her eyes and her hair was white as snow.

"Im fine. Anderson told me to see you, but you weren't there." Shepard said as she let go of the doctor.

"Sorry. Jenkins here took my time away from the med bay." She laughed.

Once she turned to Jenkins, they talked about the mission and a bit about Specters. Trying to get much information about them. It intrigued her that no humans have never been made Specters. She thought Anderson would make an amazing Spectre. They laughed at the romantic ways Jenkins had of life within the Spectres. She excused herself and promised the doctor that she would be in her med bay once the briefing was over.

She walked into the comm room and her heart skipped a beat. There, in front of her looking at the screen with pictures of Eden Prime, was Nihlus.

"You know… we really need to stop meeting like this." Joked Shepard once she composed herself and approached him.

He laughed. A deep rumble coming from his chest that made her knees weak.

"And if I don't? What if I want to continue meeting you like this?" He said and approached her.

She looked down as she flushed. With one taloned gloved finger, he lifted her chin to look at his bright green eyes. He was a dark chocolate turian with white intricate markings on his face. His green eyes always made her melt. They would shine bright at the mere sight of her.

"Nihlus…" She murmured as she watched him.

He brought his lip plates to hers, kissing her softly before pulling away from her. Her cheeks turned from pink to red. She brought her fingers to her lips. Even if he didn't have "lips", his lip plates were soft. His mandibles fluttered, brushing her face.

When Shepard graduated from the N7 program she decided to tell Nihlus her feelings. To her surprise he returned them. They dated and then it turned serious. She was scared as was he, but for different reasons.

She was scared because their relationship was a secret. They only saw each other when he was at Arcturus station for a "mission" from the council, she would slip into his ship to have heated make out sessions. She was scared because the first contact war was still fresh in both races. They couldn't see turians and humans together. They barely tolerated each other.

He was afraid because as a Spectre he would one day die and he didn't want to leave her alone without him.

They broke it off and completely stopped seeing each other. It was a few years later that they saw each other again and decided to be friends, which worked. Until now as he kissed her.

Shepard was pulled out of her reverie when Nihlus started to speak to her.

"I'm interested in this world we're going to - Eden Prime. I've heard its quite beautiful."

She watched as he turned around to assess her response.

"I have only been there once." She composed herself as she talked business. "Its a paradise."

"Yes… I remember your assessment of the place." He took a deep breath. "Eden Prime has become something of a symbol for your people, hasn't it?"

She raised an eyebrow at seeing that he was alternating between his feet. He turned back around to look at the pictures.

"Proof that humanity can not only establish colonies across the galaxy, but also protect them." He turned to face her with his arms across his chest and a hand under his chin. "But how safe is it, really?"

"Nihlus?" She went up to him. Her eyes harden. "Are you threatening humanity?" She backed away from him slightly. "More importantly, what is a Spectre doing aboard a ship that is only doing a so called _shakedown run._" She lightly snapped.

"Your people are still newcomers, Celestine. The galaxy can be a very dangerous place." He looked over her head to see Anderson walking in. "Is the Alliance truly ready for this?"

"Ready for what?" She snorted.

"I think its about time we told her what is really going on." Anderson said as he looked at Nihlus for permission.

Shepard turned around and stood between Anderson and Nihlus.

"This mission is far more than a simple shakedown run." Nihlus looked at her with apologetic eyes.

And there was the damned dreaded feeling. That missing part that wouldn't settle and yet, something was still wrong.

'_But what is it that i'm not seeing?!'_

Shepard balled her hands into fists and gave them a glare. Both Anderson and Nihlus swore that the room turn colder.

"I have never, once, held secrets from you both." She said dangerously. "And you know I hate being kept in the dark."

"Information is in a need to know basis-"

"Exactly! I need to know what the fuck is going on!" She snapped at him.

Anderson sighed. He rubbed his neck as he looked at the floor then at her. Her deep blue eyes creating a storm of emotions. It reminded him of a time when he went fishing and a storm rolled in. The beautiful sun was blocked by dark clouds and the ocean became dark just like her eyes were now.

"We're making a cover pick-up on Eden Prime. That's why we needed the stealth systems operational." Anderson filled in.

Shepard was angry that they didn't trust her with information. Holding back information made others jumpy and things go wrong. She was surprised that so far, everything was going smoothly.

She stood there with her arms across her chest as she listened to Anderson and Nihlus. She was slightly surprised that it was a beacon that was Prothean.

"The beacon's not the only reason i'm here Cele." Nihlus said with a knowing look.

She raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"Nihlus wants to see you in action, Celestine. He's here to evaluate you." Anderson grinned at her.

"Evaluate me?" She snorted. "Guess that explains why I always bump into him."

"Well you should know, the Alliance has been pushing for this for a long time-" Started Anderson.

Shepard raised her hand for him to stop.

"I know, I know." She sighed. She had heard this _many_ times, that she lost count.

Anderson shook his head at her impatience and rudeness to cut him off.

"That's why I put your name forward as a candidate for the Spectres." Nihlus grinned at her.

Her eyes widen as she looked at Nihlus with her mouth open.

"I need to see your skills for myself, Celestine. Eden Prime will be the first of several missions together." He smiled at her.

"B-But you already have seen my skills." Shepard stuttered.

Nihlus cleared his throat to stop his laughter. Shepard looked at him weird before she caught on and scowled at him.

"Wait? What about Bryant?" She looked at Anderson.

"I put his name forward as well. Once this is over and he is done with his mission, we shall be working together. You both have skills the Council looks for in people." Nihlus smirked.

Anderson cleared his throat. "To start. You will be in charge of the ground team. Secure the beacon and get it onto the ship ASAP. Nihlus will accompany you to observe the mission."

Nihlus and Anderson briefed her on more things as she asked more questions. She was shocked about the candidacy. She really wanted to prove to Nihlus what she could do. She was excited.

That was until Jeff called Anderson on the comm link, cutting Anderson's conversation.

"Captain! We've got a problem." Jeff announced with a bit of fear in his voice.

Anderson turned and looked up. "What's wrong Joker?"

"Transmission from Eden Prime, sir. You better see this!" He exclaimed.

Shepard once more became angry.

"Need to know basis." She murmured at Anderson as she stood behind him.

He turned his head a bit and gave a sad look. "Bring it up on screen."

What Shepard saw made her gasp in horror. Eden Prime was in ruins. Smoke coming from the background and there was a lot of shooting and people dying in front of the camera. That was until a woman in medium white and pink armor showed up and told the cameraman to get down.

"ASH!" Shepard cried out at the screen.

Ashley was helping other people get to safety as the soldiers that they had were firing back at something that the camera couldn't focus on. The dirt exploded around them and one soldier announced that there were heavy casualties. He stopped talking when he turned to the rumble in the far distance.

Anderson froze as did Nihlus at the monstrosity that the camera tried to focus on. Shepard's blood ran cold. Every bone in her body shuttered.

"David…" She whispered.

Anderson turned to see her wide eyed at the screen as he told Joker to hold and reverse to see the imagine of the monster.

"Celestine." Anderson went to shake her, but she wouldn't move. She didn't hear him.

_She heard that noise. She didn't know where. She just heard that noise. She ran from it, as it continued to make that roar. Or screech. It chased her everywhere she turned and ran to._

_A hand appeared from the shadows and stopped her. She turned her gaze at the cold eyes that mirrored hers. She struggled to pull away but it was futile. The shadow dragged her further within the darkness. She looked up in horror as the shadow pulled her in front of the monstrosity that chased her._

"_**Resistance is futile!"**_

_She screamed as something sharp went into her head._

"_I'm sorry, -…"_

_She turned to the figure that only mirrored her eyes._

"_-!"_

"Celestine!" Shouted Nihlus as he shook her to respond.

She blinked and pushed him away. She brought a hand to her head, lifting her bangs and the other to her heart, trying to calm its erratic beat.

"Are you alright." Asked Anderson as he tried to touch her.

She backed away from his touch.

"I'm alright." Her eyes went wide with fear. "I need to see Ashley!" She ran out of the room as the two men called to her.

They followed her as she went down the stairs and into the lift to take her down. Anderson barking at Jenkins and Alenko to suit up and meet him in the cargo bay. Karin hearing the commotion waited for the elevator to come back up before she stepped in with Alenko, Jenkins, Anderson and Nihlus.

They came down to see Shepard, grab her weapons in a blur and unlocking the Mako.

"You are not going in the Mako, Celestine!" Yelled Anderson.

Nihlus grabbed her and put her hands behind her. She struggled. Her eyes wild as Karin went to her and injected her with a minor sedative to calm her nerves and let her regain herself. Alekno and Jenkins just looked at her with concern once they went to their lockers to retrieve their gear.

"Celestine?" Asked Nihlus with concern as he held her at arms length.

"I'm alright Ni. I'm alright." She whispered as she looked down, closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

Nihlus let her go and took a step back. Jeff announced that they were within the atmosphere of Eden Prime and they were approaching drop point one.

She raised her eyebrow as Nihlus checked his guns.

"Nihlus, you aren't coming with us?" Asked Jenkins.

"I move faster on my own." He replied. He looked at Celestine as the cargo bay doors opened.

There was that feeling… She couldn't make anything of it. She looked at Nihlus and back out the sky as the Normandy descended towards the drop zone. Her eyes locked with his again.

They didn't need to speak for him to know that she wanted him to be careful. He nodded in her direction before he ran and jumped out the cargo bay.

The feeling of dread intensified as he jumped out the cargo bay. She wanted to reach out and tell him to stop. But it was too late. She only hoped that her feeling of dread was wrong. So very wrong.


	4. Chapter 2 - Eden Prime

Hello my amazing readers!

Sorry for the super long week of not uploading a new chapter! Now that I have a bit of a breather, I can upload another long but not _super_ long chapter!

Thank you all those who are viewing my story. It truly means a lot to see the number of views go up. It really, _really_ makes me want to continue writing, knowing that there are people out there who are taking their time away from their daily, busy lives to read my story. I hope its entertaining enough :3.

1ST - **I do not own any characters or anything, that belongs to BIOWARE, besides the plot!**

2ND -** This story, although it starts Rated PG-13, I am going to rated it Rated M, for there will be dark things in my story, heavy language and sex. Not for teens or children! Well unless you are 18 or are mature enough to read this.**

3RD - **Please remember to READ, RATE AND REVIEW! The three "R's!"**

Love, Serenity-X-Garrus

* * *

Chapter Two: Eden Prime

Anderson gave them commands and they sounded off as the next drop point came. The three ran and jumped just like Nihlus did. Her boots hit the ground as she squatted to lessen the impact on her legs. Kaidan's eyes darken with lust at her practically doing the splits.

Her outfit was sexy and he enjoyed it. She was dressed in navy blue jumpsuit that clung to her in all the right places. The zipper was down to where you could see her skin but not enough to see her supple breasts. She had a wide grey belt that had four pockets in the back. She wore soft, velvet grey gloves that had a good grip on her guns. To her left she had a red velvet side cape that reached to the back of her knees. On her feet she wore ankle length combat boots with a five inch thick wedge. The bottom of her boots had ridges to help her walk on rocky terrain and up hills. It gave her a better footing when fighting and shooting.

Her raven hair was loose and it went down to her waist, brushing her nice rounded ass. Her eyes were a deep blue like the ocean depths. Her skin was golden with small soft red lips. Her lipgloss made her red lips shine. She wore black eye liner making her blue eyes pop. Her bangs fluttered and brushed against her perfectly raven eyebrows that were plucked to perfection.

She was breathtaking as she took out her assault rifle and looked around with her cold mask. In every mission she had a mask of indifference. She was cold and ruthless. She obeyed the rules to some extent but still got the job done. She had the metal patch of N7 above her right breast. Next to it was the metal patch of the Alliance. On her shoulders were her rank of Lieutenant Commander in grey.

Kaidan was snapped of his day dream when she heard her command to move out.

Shepard went forward with her gun pointing. She looked at the devastation. There was scorch marks from gunfire and a smell of burnt flesh. They came to a lake that had creatures that were hovering and had some kind of gas bags on their back. She turned slightly to see that indeed there were burnt corpses nearby ontop of some rocks by the lake.

"Gas Bags. Don't worry they're harmless." Jenkins said.

Shepard turned around as one came close to her. It stared at her with its two small eyes. She reached to pet it slightly as it nuzzled her. It was harmless. She remember seeing one a long time ago.

"_Those things stink!" The woman beside her made a disgusting face._

_Shepard laughed as one came close. She placed her hand on its face as it nuzzled her._

"_Dont be such a wimp Ash." Shepard laughed a bit harder as one approached her._

"_I cant help it! They smell weird."_

_Ashley walked backwards as the thing kept coming to her. She didn't see behind her and she tripped and fell within the murky water._

"_Ugh!" She yelled as she was suddenly surrounded by the Gas Bags._

_A deep chuckle came through the Gas Bags and a hand helped Ashley up._

"_Thanks Bryant." Ashley gagged._

_He shook his head._

"_Come on you guys. Lets take a shower and go eat. I'm starving!" He gave them his devilish grin that made Ashley melt at the knees._

Shepard shook her head. Something caught her eye. She went to it. A container. She opened it to find a mod for her shields. She stored it on her back pouch on her belt and continued going up. She gave a hand signal for them to stop. She analyzed her surroundings. The rocks seemed to provide excellent cover. As she looked around, just to be safe, a gut feeling told her that something was hiding.

"This place got hit hard Commander. Hostiles everywhere. Keep your guard up." Reported Nihlus through her comm link.

Shepard slightly smiled at hearing his voice.

She gave the signal to move. Jenkins went first and thats when she spotted the shimmer. She biotically threw Jenkins to a nearby rock as the drone decloaked and started shooting. Three more followed in its wake.

"Richard!" She yelled over the gunfire. "You alright?!" She opened her omni tool and popped up from her cover to use overload.

"Yeah! I'm great! Thanks for the save!" He yelled back as he raised his assault rifle and started to fire.

"Kaidan! Go left and I will go right! See if you can throw those fuckers against the trees!" She shouted.

"On it Commander!"

On three, they were in sync as she ran and fired shots at the same time as Kaidan. She used overload on the left as Kaidan threw it on the wall. Jenkins fired at the left and turned in time to see the one on the right being thrown to the trees. The one in the middle exploded as Shepard tried to hack it.

"Great job. Lets go." Shepard praised.

The two men nodded and continued going up. She spotted two containers. One had medigel which Kaidan took. He was the medic for their mission. The other, Jenkins grabbed the mod for his assault rifle. There was one for a sniper and she took it. It was in mid condition. She turned it in her hands. She pocket it away knowing that she could fix it to make it something worth having.

They came at a three way fork.

"Richard you go left, Kaidan you go right and I will go in the middle."

They nodded as they split up.

"Found some medi gel Kaidan." Whispered Jenkins through the comm.

"Thanks. Give it to me later." Kaidan whispered back.

Shepard's heart wanted to burst out of her chest. She was afraid. She wanted to find Ashley. She prayed to every being that Ashley lived. She heard a noise. It sounded like running. Then a gun fire. She looked up only to see Jenkins running without her command to help the woman who tripped and fell.

"Richard!" Shepard barked.

Jenkins cried out as he was shot multiple times as he tried to get the woman to the nearby rock. He fell on his back breathing heavily. He was losing blood fast.

'_Damn it! If I live through this, i'm never buying Elkoss Combine shit!'_ He thought as he groaned in pain.

The woman was shocked. She stared at Jenkins before rage grabbed a hold of her. She took out his pistol and shot the two drones quickly. That got the attention of the true enemy behind the attack on Eden Prime.

The two machines put a human on a spike. Then turned around at the commotion. They started to fire as Shepard saw the woman go behind the huge rock for cover, dragging Jenkins with her.

"Ash!" Shepard yelled.

The said woman looked straight ahead as Shepard vaulted over her cover and made a run for the woman.

"Cele!" Ashley yelled back but in a commanding tone for her to stop.

"Thank the spirits you are alive!" Shepard said as she put a hand to her ear piece. "Kaidan! Maneuver delta!" She barked.

"On it Commander!"

Kaidan ran in front of the rock and charged his biotic barriers. Shepard used the distraction to overload their shields. Kaidan used throw and Ashley finished them off.

"Rich!" Shepard ran to Jenkins once the fight was over as did Kaidan.

"Did… I… do… good…. C-C-Commander?" He gasped between breaths.

Shepard nodded. "You did amazing soldier. Rest. Everything will be alright."

She looked at Kaidan as he flushed Jenkins with medi-gel. He looked at her eyes and slowly shook his head. Her heart clenched painfully. This was not suppose to happen. Tears welled up in her eyes but she blinked them back.

Jenkins nodded. "It… was…. an… h-honor to… serve… you…"

With that he took his last breath as blood came from the side of his lips. Shepard put his hands together and closed his eyes. She bowed her head and gave a silent quick prayer.

Kaidan and Ashley looked down. They didn't know what to say.

"We'll see that he receives a proper service once the mission is complete." She got up and looked at Kaidan who felt the pain more.

"Stay focus Kaidan. He was a great man. Lets avenge him." Shepard went to him and gave him a hug.

He returned the embrace. He was slightly disappointed that she ended the embrace as she backed away from him and turned to the woman named Ashley.

"Ash…" Shepard said her name softly.

Ashley looked down then at her and suddenly was an embrace.

"I thought you died when I looked at the vid that the security team sent." She whispered as she held Ashley tighter.

Ashley Madeline Williams. One hell of a soldier with a temper and a sharp tongue to match. She has a big family and is the oldest of her three sisters. Her eyes were the warmest hazel eyes, Shepard had ever seen. Her brown hair was tied up in its usual bun. She still wore the medium white with pink armor known as Phoenix Armor. Celestine and Bryant gave her that armor for her birthday a few years back. She loved it and she hurriedly tried it on. She loved the feel and the way it moved with her. It was light and not heavy like most armor and she was able to move faster with it.

"Glad to see a friendly face." Ashley said.

Shepard pulled back at the harsh tone she carried. Shepard composed herself and put on her mask of indifference.

"What has happened Ashley?" Shepard asked, as she looked around then back at her.

"Are you wounded?" Asked Kaidan as he retrieved the medi gel pack from Jenkins.

"No. Im alright… thanks to your friend." Answered Ashley softly in Kaidan's direction.

She turned to face Shepard.

"The others weren't so lucky." Her face harden.

"What others?" Shepard frowned. "Where is your squad?"

Ashley glared at her. "They died when we doubled back to the beacon. It was an ambush and they died while I retreated…" She looked down as she balled her hands into fists. "Im the only one left."

"Ash… im sorry about your squad. I know how you were all close." Shepard soften slightly at her sadness.

Ashley blinked back tears as she dug her nails into her gloves.

"They held as along as they could before the Geth overwhelmed them." She glared in the direction she came from.

"Wait a minute. Did you just mention the Geth?" Kaidan turned to Shepard in pure disbelief. "The Geth have not been seen outside the veil in nearly_ 200 years?_"

"Yeah, well, they are damn well and here now!" Ashley snapped.

"Ashley. Its not his fault. I understand your rage better than anyone, but right now, we have a mission." Shepard tried to soothe Ashley.

"What's your mission?"

"To get that beacon to the Normandy ASAP."

Ashley nodded. "Mind if I have your rifle? The beacon is just at the far end of this trench." She pointed.

Shepard nodded and gave her the rifle. She took out her sniper rifle.

"Lets move out. Ashley, you take point since you know where the beacon is."

Ashley nodded and took point. Shepard went to the tool box to the side and grabbed two mods for a pistol and for her armor. She gave one last sad look in Jenkins direction before she followed Ashley.

Everywhere they turned, there were humans on spikes. And then they were engaged in another battle with the Geth. After finding out that the beacon was not where Ashley said it would be and that Nihlus would be checking out the spaceport, the team went to what Ashley said was the science camp. They were shocked to see it in smoking ruins.

'_Resistance is futile...'_

Shepard took out her pistol and put her sniper away as she turned to look at the spikes that descended down and a new life form stared at her...

"_He is a fine specimen… too bad he died a horrible death…"_

_The figure with the blue eyes shrugged._

"_I like to think of it as it was reborn into something better."_

_The blue eyes turned to look at her. She felt afraid. She shivered involuntarily as the figure approached her._

"_Dont be scared -. Everything will be alright. Come and see."_

_A hand came in front her. She hesitantly took it and was lifted to see the figure that looked like it had cables running around its body. Suddenly it grabbed her and she screamed._

"Celestine!" Yelled Ashley as she shook her to wake up.

Shepard pushed her away as she shook her head. She looked around and noticed that she was inside one of the bunkers that the colonists had. Kaidan looked at her with concern as he grabbed the medi gel from the container.

"You alright?" Ashley asked with a sigh.

Shepard looked outside and saw the three husks dead.

"Yeah. Fine." She took a deep breath and walked went outside.

"This is the second time this happens." Kaidan said as he approached her and made her stop to turn around to face him.

"I'm alright Kaidan." She gave him a weak smile. "I will see the doc when this is done."

Kaidan only nodded and let her go.

"This one seems locked." Ashley pointed.

"On it." Said Kaidan as he opened his omni tool and began the program that would open the door to the bunker.

Shepard heard a gasp and some scuffle.

"Stop." Said Shepard as she approached the metallic shade blinds.

"Excuse me? Are you alright?" Shepard asked softly.

"Oh! Thank goodness! I thought you were the Geth!" The scientist said.

The door slid open and the three walked in to see two scientists, one woman and one man, hiding in the corner of the bunker.

"Thank you for saving us." Said the woman with red hair and sparkling green eyes.

They got some information as Ashley asked the two scientists about the beacon. Shepard punched the crazy man earning her a reproach from Kaidan and the scientist. She commented that it was for the best. After acquiring what information she could from the scientist, they re-locked the door to make sure they wouldn't be harmed and went on their way. They collected what they could from leftover containers and proceeded to continue toward the spaceport when suddenly a gunshot went off.

Shepard's entire being froze at that sound.

'_That shot wasn't normal…'_

She turned to look at Ashley and Kaidan also feeling a sense of dread. Suddenly her eyes widen.

'_Nihlus!'_

Shepard ran straight for the spaceport.

"Celestine!" Yelled Ashley in a vain attempt to get her attention.

Kaidan and Ashley ran behind her and nearly bumped into her as Shepard stopped running. Ashley and Kaidan looked at what Shepard had her eyes fixed on. They both gasped at the huge ship.

"Is that- Is that a ship?!" Ashley nearly yelled in horror.

"What is that?!" Kaidan asked horrified.

'_Resistance is futile...'_

It had whispered in her mind again. She lowered her head as her eyes narrowed on her enemies.

Husks plus some geth came at them. Kaidan and Ashley jumped in front of Shepard to protect her, but she was alert. She dived into the fray shooting and tearing apart the geth and the husks that came her way with her biotics until there was no more.

She turned to a bunker, the same as the last as Ashley and Kaidan looked around for anything useful.

Three humans sought refuge inside the bunker. Ashley interrogated them until one said something that caught her interest. It was enough to threaten the man who acted as their leader. They gave her a new pistol and a powerful mod and permission to get anything inside their bunker which Kaidan went to check.

He came back out with a fresh new light armor, leaving his old one behind. It was a military green. He liked the lightness of it and it could pack more things and hold more medi gel. Shepard gave him the new pistol with the mod since he preferred pistols over any other weapon.

They left the three humans back inside the bunker and locked it with new modifications, giving them the code once the Alliance came with the all clear.

Shepard ran to the spaceport with Ashley following close behind along with Kaidan.

"NIHLUS!" Shepard cried out as she reached the top of the spaceport. "Nihlus! Wake up!" She shook him in desperation as Kaidan scanned him.

"Cele…"

Shepard looked at Kaidan and shook her head as tears brimmed her eyes.

"No. No, no no!" She grabbed his face. "Your promised you would be careful!" She yelled at his corpse.

"Please… please." She whispered into his ear canal as she hugged his neck. "Please open your beautiful emerald eyes that always shine with love towards me… please…"

When no response came she just stared at him. She was lost. Seemingly unaware of her surroundings. It was just him and her.

Ashley went to her and rubbed her back. Ashley knew of Nihlus and Shepard. She told her a while back. It hurt her to see her best friend in pain. Kaidan didn't know and thought that maybe they were friends. He pried the turian away from Shepard as softly as he could from her holding his head on her lap.

Ashley heard a kick to a box and took out her gun towards the pile of boxes.

"Come out! Now!" Ashley commanded.

Kaidan took out his gun as well once he put the Spectre in a secure place.

A human came out of the shelves. Ashley did all the talking as Shepard was in her own world. Suddenly, she bolted up and took out her pistol as the human mentioned a name she hadn't heard in a long time. She went to him in a blur of blue and clutched his shirt while pointed the gun to his head.

"What did you say?" She hissed.

"Saren! Saren killed the other turian!" The human tried to get out of her hold.

"You must have him mistaken."

Her cold eyes scared him.

"Im telling the truth! I dont lie!" The man pleaded.

"No. But he does hide things." Kaidan said as he opened a box full of explosives that were separate from the other boxes that had clothes and things for the colony.

"You are the contact that they mentioned!" Ashley bit out angrily.

"I should shoot you for being a thief and a liar." Shepard said dangerously.

"No one was going to miss them! Who would attack Eden Prime!" The man desperately made his case.

Shepard let him go harshly that he stumbled back and fell on his ass. He looked at her fearfully.

Shepard didn't say anything else and let Ashley do all the talking.

"Oh Ni…" She whispered as she kneeled to stroke his now, cold mandible.

A movement caught her attention and rage took over. Her biotics exploded violently out as her eyes changed from deep blue to pure white and she charged the geth that were on the ramp. Ashley and Kaidan came to assist her but she was a blur as she raced down the tram and shredded every geth that stood in her way.

It was over in a blink of an eye.

Ashley and Kaidan arrived with her as the tram train started to move to the other side of the spaceport.

She was still glowing as her rage wouldn't settle until she destroyed everything in her way. Ashley and Kaidan were very worried for her. When Ashley neared her, she was hot like the sun itself that made her flinch away from Shepard. She looked at Kaidan bewildered as he shrugged, not knowing what to say to that.

When they arrived at the spaceport, it only took five minutes to dispatch every geth and husk that came her way. Ashley and Kaidan disarmed the bombs that were left behind.

"Celestine!" Ashley cried out as she ran down the ramp to see Shepard gasping for breath as she was on her hands and knees.

"You alright?" She asked as she helped Shepard stand.

She only nodded. Ashley sat Shepard nearby a crate as she went to investigate the contents around the perimeter. She found great mods, credits lying around and some gear that she put all into a light crate to carry around.

"Thanks Ash. Sorry about what you saw." Said Shepard as she walked over to where Ashley was.

Ashley waved a hand in dismissal. "I know how you feel Cele…" She looked down. "I'm sorry about Nihlus…" She said softly.

Shepard sighed as she looked up at the sky. The sky was red as if it was bleeding. Fitting for the scene to the colony. The sky looked as how she felt.

"It wasn't doing that when they dug it up." Said Ashley, bringing Shepard to look at the beacon.

She blinked as she suddenly felt something calling to her. It sounded like a soft hum.

Kaidan inspected the beacon closely, getting lost in the intricate designs or symbols of the beacon when the beacon exploded a green light trying to suck him in.

Ashley didn't see as she approached Shepard. Shepard on the other hand, moved Ashley out of the way to get to Kaidan.

"Kaidan!" She yelled as she ran to him.

Kaidan tried so hard to get away from the force. She ran up and caught him. With her biotics she threw him out of the way. He rolled towards Ashley.

"Celestine!" He tried to get away from Ashley's grip.

Thats when Shepard was taken from the ground as a pulse flared out to hug her.

"No! Its too dangerous!" Ashley barked at Kaidan as he struggled.

Shepard saw what could only be described as a nightmare. It was too fast for her to register it before she was thrown on the floor. She hit her head from the impact as the beacon shattered and the light it had, died down until it wasn't glowing. The corners of her eyes darken until all she should see was darkness and only hear Kaidan with Ashley, calling her name in desperation.


	5. Chapter 3 - First Glimpse Of My Dreams

Chapter Three: First Glimpse Of My Dreams

Hello everyone! Sorry if I havent uploaded a chapter! Busy and all =D I want to thank those who take the time to read my chapters. I know they are a bit long but I dont and wont upload as often. Your views are important to me and it makes me giddy to see the view numbers go up! Thank again! Enjoy the new chapter.

1ST - **I do not own any characters or anything, that belongs to BIOWARE, besides the plot!**

2ND -** This story, although it starts Rated PG-13, I am going to rated it Rated M, for there will be dark things in my story, heavy language and sex. Not for teens or children! Well unless you are 18 or are mature enough to read this.**

3RD - **Please remember to READ, RATE AND REVIEW! The three "R's!"**

Love, Serenity-X-Garrus

* * *

_She ran. Giggling. She heard that she was giggling. Water lapped at her bare feet as she ran through the sand. Her giggling turned to hysterical laughter._

"_Gotcha!" _

_They fell onto the sand. They rolled as they separated. Both were laughing as they stared at the clear blue sky._

"_You are so fast!" Said the deep voice as their laughter died down._

"_So are you!" She said cheerfully._

_They turned to stare at each other. His eyes always captivated her. _

"_What you wanna do next?" Asked her friend._

_Before she could answer, there was that shriek again. That metallic shriek. The scene changed to a darker one. The sky was red, the beach was dried into a desert and the sand was not soft but hard under her feet. She looked up only to see a laser come towards…_

"_-!" Screamed her friend._

_She reached out, unable to scream his name._

'_What is his name!? Why cant I remember his name?!' Her mind yelled at her._

_It didn't matter what his name was as the laser went to him and he disintegrated right in front of her._

"_**Resistance is futile!"** It roared at her, as the beam went to her._

_She screamed._

Shepard bolted awake.

"Doc! Shes awake!" Said Kaidan with relief.

Shepard slapped the hands away that wanted to touch her.

"Its alright Shepard. Everything is going to be alright." Cooed Karin.

Shepard finally registered where she was. She felt stiff and smelled weird. She looked down to see that she was in a tanktop and in her military pants with pockets to the side with no shoes. Her grey tank top was very dark, indicating that she was sweating. Her hair was tied back into a low ponytail.

"How long have I been out?" She croaked.

Her hand went to her throat as she grimaced at how dry it was. Kaidan brought her a cup of water as Karin scanned her.

"For fifteen hours and a half. How are you feeling?"

Shepard smiled at Kaidan as she took the cup and took small sips. Relishing in the cool liquid as it poured down her throat.

"I feel like my head is about to explode." She said as she drank the remainder of the water, before giving the empty cup to Kaidan.

"Something happened down there with the beacon I think." Mused Karin.

"Its my fault." Said Kaidan as he turned to look at her with sadness. "I must have activated some kind of force field. If you haven't pushed me out the way, none of this would be happening."

"Kaidan… There is no way you could have known." Shepard said softly to him.

He smiled in gratitude. "Thanks. But it doesn't make me feel any better about it."

"Well, we don't really know if that's what really set it off. Unfortunately we will never get to find out." Karin said as she looked at her omni tool scans.

Shepard looked at her sharply. "Explain."

"We didn't retrieve the beacon, Cele. It was destroyed." Elaborated Kaidan.

Shepard groaned as she put her head in her hands.

"Fuck!" She cursed.

"It wasn't your fault Cele. Anderson will understand if you tell him." Added Kaidan.

"I'm noticing some unusual brain activity. Abnormal beta waves. I also noticed an increase in eye movement…" Karin brought a light to Shepard's eyes to look at her pupils. "...Signs typically associated with intense dreaming." She finished as she backed away from Shepard and typed a few things into her omni tool.

Once done she looked at Shepard again.

"What did you see Shepard?" She asked softly.

"I saw…" She looked down at her hands. The dream playing in her mind and then what she saw in the beacon.

"I don't know what I saw…" She reached out as if to grab hold of something or someone.

Karin grabbed her hands and looked into her eyes.

"I will add this to my report. I want you to come and see me if this happens again. It may- Oh Captain Anderson." She stopped talking as doors to her medbay opened.

Anderson nodded in her direction. "How is our XO holding?"

"She is fine."

Karin went to Anderson and whispered something in his ear. He nodded and asked to speak with Shepard herself. Kaidan dismissed himself as did Karin saying that she will be nearby. Once they were gone they stared at each other.

"Cele-"

"Don't." She raised her hand to stop him as she looked away.

"I don't know what to say, but i'm sorry." He said softly.

A small sob broke out before she could stop it. She put a hand to her mouth to stop another sob that threatened to come out. Anderson came and hugged her and that's when she broke. She clutched to him as she cried. Anderson offered words of comfort for the distraught Commander as he petted her head.

Celestine cried for Jenkins, because he was her friend. He was good at his job and now the Normandy won't be the same without his sunny disposition. But most of all she cried painfully for the one turian that held her heart and in just a couple of hours managed to shatter it into a thousands pieces.

She wouldn't hear his voice anymore. Telling her that he missed her and that he couldn't wait to hang out with her. She won't see his smile or hear his laugh at her attempt at lame jokes. Those green eyes that always shined with love towards her, were now closed and never to open again. She won't feel his warmth as he embraced her and spinned her around at being excited to see her again.

Her sobs soon turned to hiccups. Anderson gave her a small cup of water. She drank it slowly as she was completely exhausted from the lack of sleep, the nightmares that plagued her, the mission, the blackout and the mourning she just did.

Anderson felt bad for her. He didn't know what to do for her.

"Where is Ash?" She asked softly.

"I requested her to transfer to the Normandy."

Shepard nodded. "Good. She's an outstanding soldier. You won't regret it."

"Lieutenant Alenko agrees with you. Thats why I added her in." Anderson took the cup and refilled it.

"You said you wanted to speak to me in private?" She said softly as she looked at the water swirling around inside the cup.

Anderson sighed. "I won't lie to you Celestine. Things look bad."

Shepard took a deep breath.

"Nihlus is dead, the beacon was destroyed and geth are invading. The Council is going to want answers."

Shepard got up from her seat and threw her cup at the wall. The water splashing onto the wall.

"The Council can kiss my _caramel_ ass." She hissed at Anderson. "I didnt do shit wrong. I won't let them blame me for the beacon!" She glared at Anderson.

He turned away from her. He watched as the liquid fell down to the floor.

"I will stand behind you and your report Celestine. You're a damn hero in my books."

He turned to face her.

"But thats not why i'm here."

He stopped to notice her hands balled into fists. Her nails digging into the palms of her hands. She shut her eyes tight as she turned away from him. Dreading the name that he knew would spill from his lips.

"Its Saren."

"HE SAVED MY LIFE!" She exploded.

Her declaration was heard even outside the medbay, that had the crew within the mess hall looking at the doors wide eyed.

"I know Celestine. Calm down." He tried to soothe.

Shepard was heaving. Trying to get air in her lungs.

"Saren is a Spectre! One of the best! A living legend!" She yelled at Anderson.

"But if he is working with the geth, it means he's gone rogue!" He snapped at her.

They stood glaring at each other.

"You would believe some farmer's reports?" She asked as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"How do you know he is not lying?" Anderson retorted.

Anderson knew it was a moot point to convince her. Especially without any evidence.

He heaved a sigh. "Saren is dangerous Cele. A rogue Spectre is trouble." He looked at her. "And he hates humans."

"Are you out of your mind?!" She looked at him with disbelief. "If he hated humans, he would have left me to _die_!"

"You are a different case! You were a child!"

"A _human_ child! If he hates humans, child or no, he would have left me there to rot! Hell he even helped the _civilians_ escape from that hell hole! _Human civilians_!" She gestured with her hand as if she was in front of the building.

Anderson shook his head. "I was there Celestine. I helped him with that mission."

"So?"

"He hates humans because he believes we are growing too fast, taking over the galaxy."

"A lot of aliens think that way." She snapped.

"But Saren has allied himself with the geth." He went to her and grabbed her shoulders. "I don't know how. I dont know why. I only know it had something to do with that beacon."

She took a step back hitting the medical bed. She sat down on it as his words sank into her brain to process the information.

"Celestine. It is vital that I know. Within that beacon… Was there something that you saw that Saren could have wanted?" Anderson asked hopeful.

Shepard shook her head. A hand went to her face. "I just… I don't know what I saw… Was it death? Distruction? I dont know? I cant make sense of it…"

Anderson looked at her with worry. She looked afraid and fragile. He felt guilty for bringing her on this mission and adding more salt to the injury of her having nightmares. Who knew what was in that beacon and he cursed Kaidan for his clumsiness.

Anderson sighed and told her that they had to tell the Council of the new development. At the mention of Donnel Udina she scrunched her nose. Anderson chuckled softly at her dislike of the Human Ambassador. He added that he was worried of what was in that beacon, for now Saren had it. He added more insults to the turian adding that humans were a blight on the galaxy. That the attack on Eden Prime was an act of war. He even went as far to say that Saren wouldn't stop until he wiped the human race from the face of the galaxy.

Shepard sighed. This was too much and her heart refused to believe that the turian, the man who saved her and made sure she was alright for two years before reuniting with her family, would be the boogeyman Anderson made him out to be.

"If what you say is true… then I will find some way to take him down." She said to him.

He shook his head and went on and on about how he was a Spectre and everything he touches was classified. That he had the Council on his side and he could do anything at the moment that he wants. He is the best they have and no matter what they said, it wouldn't compare to the years the Council has known him and for his excellent records.

"Thats why we need the Council on our side." He commented as he started to pace.

"If we prove that Saren has gone…" She swallowed hard. "Rouge… then the Council will revoke his Spectre status."

Anderson said he would contact the Ambassador and that in the meantime she go up to the bridge and see Jeff and to tell him to bring them into dock at the Citadel. He left Shepard alone to gather her thoughts.

She deflated and slouched as she tried to process everything. She was inside for three minutes before the door opened and Karin walked in. She scanned her again, gave her a relaxant and scolded her for the thrown water on her wall. Shepard apologized as she put on her boots and exited the medbay.

"Cele!"

She turned to her nickname.

"Ash!"

Shepard went to Ashley and embraced her. They chatted for a bit. Each offering words of comfort to the other and Kaidan jumped into the conversation. They left Nihlus out of it. Ashley nudged Kaidan on the ribs when he wanted to say something about Nihlus but at seeing her face fall at the mention of his name, Ashley made sure that Kaidan kept his mouth shut. Shepard promised Ashley that they would eat at the Citadel to show her around since it was her first time. It was her treat.

"I will hold you to that." Ashley sing songed.

"Since when do I break my promises?" Shepard added as she walked away.

She passed a few people, offering condolences and hugging others who were mourning for Jenkins. That went on until she reached the cockpit where Joker was typing like crazy.

"Hey Je-Joker." She greeted softly as she sat down on the co-pilot seat.

"Hey." He replied softly.

"Im sorry…" Jeff said after a moment of silence.

"I know Joker… I miss him very much…" She whispered softly as she started to help Jeff.

Jeff only nodded and smiled at her gratefully for helping out. They worked in companionable silence until Citadel Command needed verification about docking. He knew why Shepard came to the bridge and obviously they had to restock on a few things so they needed to dock at the Citadel.

Ashley came by along with Kaidan to check out the view. Ashley teased Jeff about the massive ship known as the Destiny Ascension. He replied that they needed firepower too. Shepard laughed softly and shook her head as she helped Jeff dock the Normandy onto docking bay 422.


	6. Chapter 4 - The Council - Part 1

Hello everyone and welcome to a new chapter! I'm quite excited to see so many viewers are tuning in to read my story that I am having SO much fun writing! Lately, I have gotten to a point where I am busy and something unexpected happen. So bare with me on the updates and I will try to make them every two weeks because the chapters are long. This chapter I had to split in two because it was SUPER long. Don't want to bore you guys now =]

Without further ado, here is Chapter Four of The Chilling Shards of Illusion!

1ST - **I do not own any characters or anything, that belongs to BIOWARE, besides the plot!**

2ND -** This story, although it starts Rated PG-13, I am going to rated it Rated M, for there will be dark things in my story, heavy language and sex. Not for teens or children! Well unless you are 18 or are mature enough to read this.**

3RD - **Please remember to READ, RATE AND REVIEW! The three "R's!"**

Love, Serenity-X-Garrus

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Chapter Four: The Council – Part 1

Shepard, Kaidan and Ashley suited up after Anderson called them to the airlock. They left the ship after the decontamination process finished and the airlock opened. At the end of the hall was a C-Sec officer who greeted them. He was a turian.

"He is in the cargo bay… Please be careful." Anderson told the C-Sec officer.

"Thank you for bringing him back. Not many would have even bothered." The turian said softly.

Anderson's hand went to the turian's shoulder and gave a sympathetic smile before he beckoned to the three humans to follow him.

Shepard turned her head slightly to see the turian staring at her. Once he was caught, he cleared his throat and ordered the C-Sec officers that accompanied him, to get their Spectre off the ship and make preparations for the memorial.

"So. What do you think Udina is going to say this time?" Kaidan tried to lighten the mood.

The elevator door closed. Shepard looked at Ashley as her face was in pure awe of the Citadel. Her eyes looked at Anderson watching Ashley as well.

"That we fucked everything up and its my fault." Shepard said sharply. "Everything's my fault in his eyes."

Kaidan's face fell slightly at her sharp tone.

"They could really change the music in these." Commented Ashley as she looked up the elevator.

"It falls on deaf ears every time." Anderson added as he looked at Shepard.

"And make it faster." Shepard growled.

Anderson chuckled. Making Kaidan and Ashley chuckle with him. Shepard sighed and turned her back to them. She wasn't in the mood to joke and she was tired. Which brought her back to the dreams she had before she woke up.

'_Why couldn't I remember his name?'_ She thought.

She frowned as she tried to concentrate on the images but it wouldn't come. It bothered her to no end.

'_It felt so real...'_

The elevator doors finally opened and they all stepped out. Anderson was cleared to proceed to the elevator in front of them that would take them to the Presidium.

"You're going to love it Williams! Best place to be." Kaidan grinned.

"Cant wait to go on my date." Ashley returned his grin.

Shepard snorted. "She's going to clean me out before the beginning of our food."

Ashley waved her hand in dismissal. "You started it! No one told you to spoil me."

Shepard gave her an incredulous look. "I spoiled you?! If anything, you made Bryant your bitch! I'm just filling in- Fuck!"

Ashley smirked.

"Bryant?" Asked Kaidan.

"Yea. Her brother." Ashley raised an eyebrow.

Kaidan face palmed himself. "I totally forgot you had a sibling."

Shepard raised an eyebrow at him. "Kaidan? We known each other, how many years?"

Kaidan huffed. "You act as if I should know."

"Well, you guys kinda don't look alike." Ashley said as an afterthought.

"Since when do siblings look alike?" Shepard retorted.

"Identical twins look alike." Kaidan added.

"They are not identical twins, moron." Ashley shook her head at him.

"Ouch!" Kaidan feign hurt.

Shepard rolled her eyes. Anderson started to laugh at their banter.

"Have you never seen her brother, Alenko?" Asked Anderson.

Kaidan was in deep thought. A moment later he looked at Anderson. "No sir. Probably had a glimpse of him. But never really _seen_ him."

"Wow." Shepard managed to say.

"I'll say." Ashley added also confused.

Soon, they were in front of Ambassador Udina's office. The doors opened only to walk in on an argument.

"This is an outrage! The Council would step in if the geth attacked a turian colony!" Udina barked.

The four humans walked in and went to the balcony. Anderson turned to Udina as he was glaring at the Council. Ashley looked out the balcony in awe, Kaidan following next to her. Shepard stood with her hands intertwined behind her back, standing at attention.

The salarian councilor shook his head. "The turians don't found colonies on the borders of the Terminus Systems, Ambassador."

"Humanity was well aware of the risks when you went into the Traverse." Added the asari councilor in a soothing voice.

Shepard wanted to just leave. This was pointless. They were pointless. Her heart refused to acknowledge that Saren was a bad guy. But something in her gut told her that she was wrong and that they were right.

"_You always listen to your heart Geai Bleu."His light blue eyes looked at her with sympathy. "When are you going to learn to trust your gut? Sometimes, following the heart can lead to many wrong paths that you will end regretting."_

Shepard shook the memory from her mind. She looked down at the floor and took a deep breath before slowly letting it out.

"This is all your fault!" Udina rounded on her as he exploded.

Shepard sharply looked at him. Her eyes instantly darken with malice towards the human ambassador.

"Watch who you accuse, Human." She said in a low dangerous tone.

"I am an Ambassador! You don't get to make threats!" He yelled at her.

"Ambassador. I would very well _recommend_ that you calm down." Anderson advised with the same cold tone of voice.

Udina huffed as he took a deep breath.

"I assume your mission reports are accurate?" Udina asked once he calmed down a fraction.

"They are. Sounds like you convinced the Council to give us an audience." Anderson took over the conversation.

Shepard just stared at the Ambassador. Ashley and Kaidan, flanking her.

Udina folded his arms and continued with briefing them about what is going on in politics. The Council was upset with the reports. Saren being their best top agent, didn't appreciate being accused of treason. Shepard wanted to smirk. She knew this was going to be difficult but she will tear Anderson and Udina a new one if they were wrong about the turian who saved her life all those years ago.

_The last thing she remembered was screaming to the top of her lungs as something heavy smashed her leg. She couldn't get out. She called for help but the fire was roaring and she was losing precious air. She collapsed as her world turned dark._

"_I got you…" _

_Was the last thing she heard as darkness embraced her._

_She bolted up and coughed, gasping for air. She tried to scream as she felt that she was being restrained by multiple hands. Fear gripped her heart, that maybe they were going to torture her before killing her._

"_Its alright. You're safe."_

'_That voice!' Her mind yelled relieved._

_She looked up to find piercing blue eyes looking at her._

'_A turian.' She thought._

"_These are friends of mine." He gestured to the two humans and another turian who looked very young. The humans… not so much._

"_Did everyone make it out?" She squeaked._

_The turian nodded. His mandibles fluttered open. Showing his razor sharp teeth. She reached out and tugged the mandible. The turian froze. He watched as she wasn't afraid but merely curious. A deep rumble came from his chest._

"_Are you part cat?" She asked him bluntly._

"_A what?"_

"_A cat? You just purred." She said matter-of factly. As if it was the most obvious thing in the world._

_The two humans laughed. The turian attending to her, glared at them._

"_A cat is a feline mammal back on earth. It makes the same noises you make." The woman answered._

"_No. I'm not erm, part cat."_

_She nodded as she let go of his face and turned to the turian with piercing green eyes. He came to her as the other turian walked away._

"_Whats your name?" He asked._

_The girl scratched her head as she tried to remember._

"_Do you have a last name?"_

"_I-" She grimaced. "I cant remember…"_

_Suddenly her eyes became wet._

"_Don't cry sweetheart. It will come to you." Said the woman as she approached her and gently wiped away her tears._

"_Whats your name?" She whispered after she gathered herself._

"_I'm Nihlus Kryik." His mandibles fluttered wide into a grin._

"_And that's Saren Arterius." He pointed to the turian busy finding something._

"_I'm Kahlee Sanders and the man behind me is David Anderson." The woman introduced._

"_Hi! Nice to meet you all!" She grinned at them all back._

"_Here. To help you remember." Said Saren as he came back with a stuffed turian._

_She grabbed it and smiled at the turian. She attempted to get up but yelped in pain._

"_You got hurt inside the refinery. You cant move for a while." Soothe Saren as fresh tears brimmed her eyes._

_She nodded and sighed as suddenly she was exhausted._

"_Sleep, parvulum. Don't worry. I will be here when you wake up." Said Saren in a soothing voice._

_His rumble made her fall instantly asleep as she clutched the turian stuffed toy to her chest._

She still had that toy. It meant everything to her growing up. She was shaken from her reverie at hearing Ashley's voice.

"And that's why I hate politicians." She shook her head as she looked at the door.

"They aren't all bad." Said Kaidan. "You alright Cele?" He asked as he grabbed her hand.

"What happened?" She said as her other hand went to her head.

Kaidan silently cheered as she didn't move her hand.

"We have to go see the Council at the tower." Replied Ashley.

Shepard nodded and her body registered that Kaidan haven't let go of her hand. She pried his hand away from her as she walked away.

"Celestine?"

"I'm alright Ash. Just… thinking."

Shepard knew that worried voice. She sighed. She didn't know what to do or feel. How to cope with so many conflicting emotions.

"No Celestine… look."

She pointed at Shepard.

Shepard looked at her hands and she was glowing. Her biotics were intensifying because of her conflicting emotions.

"You need to relax your emotions, Celestine." Advised Kaidan.

She closed her eyes and counted to ten before she opened them. Kaidan sighed. He knew the face or mask she put on, was the only mask to help her cope with her biotics.

They were greeted by an asari who worked as a secretary for the embassy. Knowing who arrives is part of her job. They were told to talk to Avina, the computer VI to help them find their way around. Shepard thought that Avina sounded more like a body wash brand, than a name for a virtual intelligence. After speaking to the VI, Kaidan suggested to use a skycar to get to the tower. Shepard shook her head and continued down past the bridge to her left and down the ramp to lead her to the tower.

"It really is beautiful. Cant wait to eat. What kind of food do they have?" Ashley asked as the elevator to the tower went up.

"Have you ever been to an expensive ass restaurant?" Asked Kaidan.

Ashley nodded.

"That's pretty much what you would find in the Presidium." He clarified.

Ashley grimaced. "Do they have a Starbucks or a dunkin donuts?"

At that Shepard laughed out loud.

"Yes. They have both. Its a bit overpriced though." Kaidan laughed along with Shepard.

"Where are the less expensive places?" Ashley frowned.

"Down in the wards. But I don't mind having to catch up over expensive coffee or expensive food. Live a little Ash." Shepard smiled at her softly as the elevator doors opened.

"Saren's hiding something! Give me more time. Stall them."

Shepard and her two friends got off the elevator to hear an intense discussion.

"Stall the Council?" The turian with blue markings and dark plates gave the other turian an incredulous look. "Don't be ridiculous! Your investigation is over, Garrus."

The darker turian turned around.

"Executor! Wait! Just- hear me out! Ugh!" The lighter turian sighed in frustration.

His eyes finally landed on the three humans approaching him.

Shepard turned from the other turian walking away to the light one walking towards them.

"Commander Shepard? Garrus Vakarian. I was the officer in charge of the C-Sec investigation into Saren." Garrus introduced himself.

She stared at him intensely.

Garrus felt unnerved by her gaze.

'_Her eyes are the same color as Palaven's night sky.'_

He shook his head.

'_Where had that come from?' _He thought.

Shepard finally extended her hand at him.

"Nice to meet you." She said as he took her hand hesitantly before she shook it.

They just stared at each other. Still shaking hands. Unable to look away. Until Kaidan cleared his throat and then groaned as Ashley elbowed him in the ribs. They let go of their hands.

"Sounds like you really want to bring him down." Observed Ashley.

"I don't trust him. Something about him rubs me the wrong way." He responded as he crossed his arms.

Shepard had to take a deep breath. _'Its not true!'_ She wanted to tell the turian.

"But he's a Spectre; everything he touches is classified. I cant find any hard evidence." He shook his head in disappointment.

Shepard snorted. "Well. You would get along with Anderson nicely." She replied curtly as she remembered the same things Anderson told her.

Garrus looked at her confused by her curt reply. "Ah. Captain Anderson is up ahead." He motioned with his head in the direction up the stairs.

"I think the Council's waiting for us, Celestine." Kaidan muttered softly.

Shepard nodded. Ashley and Kaidan went ahead of her as she followed him but not before she looked back at the turian who was also watching her. She turned around when she heard his whisper;

"Good luck Shepard. Maybe they'll listen to you."

She was in deep thought as she heard Kaidan speak about the turian.

"I don't like him. He gives me a bad vibe." Growled Kaidan.

"You barely met the guy." Ashley said.

Shepard stared at her surprised. Even Ashley was surprised.

"What? Why are you guys looking at each other like that?" Asked Kaidan.

"Well I'm not all the way xenophobic, Celestine." Ashley suddenly frowned.

"I'm not saying you were or weren't. I'm surprised is all." Shepard replied.

"You're xenophobic?" Kaidan now was surprised.

"Its a long story but I'm not all the way." Ashley sighed.

Shepard snorted. "Long story my ass."

Ashley glared at her.

"Don't start." Ashley said through gritted teeth.

"What happened?" Asked Kaidan as he stepped between the two women.

"Her grandfather happened." Was all Shepard said as they reached the top of the stairs and were greeted by Anderson.

"About time you showed up! The hearing's already started. Come on." Said an impatient Anderson.

Shepard rolled her eyes at him as he lead them to the top of the stairs where there was a long bridge with a console at the end of the bridge. The Council, fittingly, were above on a stage looking down at them from their podiums. Politicians were on the top floors chattering in hushed tones as they heard the hearing. Below them was a nice windowed ceiling with more of those pink trees and grass with rocks. Like a greenhouse of sorts. Behind the council were nice decorated windows.

Shepard however wasn't enjoying the scenery as beside the Council, in a hologram was the turian who, because of him, she was alive and well. Because of him, she became what she is today. Because of him, she and Nihlus were close because he brought Nihlus into her life. And now here she was, watching him being put on trial. An unfair trial.

She heard what Udina added as "evidence." She snorted and muttered to herself, until he mentioned the dock worker's report. She wanted to laugh out loud at the salarian's response to that. It was the same that she gave Anderson.

"I resent these accusations. Nihlus was a fellow Spectre. And my god-son." Saren hissed.

Shepard felt small. His pain in his voice was very clear. He just lost a family member…This was very unfair. She wanted to go to the hologram and hug him.

"That just let you catch him off guard!" Anderson declared with a glare.

Shepard looked at him sharply. She wanted to throw him around until he saw reason! She looked at Saren's hologram as he looked at Anderson with his own glare.

"Captain Anderson. You always seem to be involved when humanity makes false charges against me."

His eyes finally fell to her and in that moment, she wished she was swallowed by a black hole. Anything to see the pain in his eyes at seeing her with those who were against him, gone.

He didn't say anything to her. He just kept her gaze. He wanted to burn her face into his memory. It had been years since he last seen her. He only heard about her through Nihlus' mail.

"The mission on Eden Prime was top secret. The only way you could know about the beacon was if you were there!" Kaidan stepped forth.

He was unnerved at how they stared at each other.

That snapped Saren out his reverie before his eyes harden at the human.

"With Nihlus gone, his files passed on to me. I read the Eden Prime report. I was, unimpressed."

That suddenly struck a nerve in Shepard. She stepped forward.

"Unimpressed?!" She shouted at him.

Saren looked taken aback.

"Your god-son died on Eden Prime and you are unimpressed!?"

Suddenly Saren glared at her.

"Of course." He spat. "What can you expect from a human?" He hissed at her.

Shepard flinched at his words as Anderson looked at her with sympathy.

"Saren despises humanity. That's why he attacked Eden Prime!" Shepard shouted surprising Saren.

"Your species needs to learn its place, Shepard. You're not ready to join the Council. You're not even ready to join the Spectres!" He shouted at her back.

Her eyes narrowed as her biotics flared. White specks were in her pupils swirling around.

She wasn't paying attention after that. He said things that only confirmed Anderson's declarations. Things he said cut her deep in her heart. Suddenly it went back to what her brother told her about her heart.

Saren responded back to everything without breaking eye contact with her. His own anger mirrored hers. He felt betrayed. It hurt.

"I agree. Our judgment must be based on facts and evidence, not wild imaginings and reckless speculation." The turian councilor said in a clipped tone.

"You know what Councilor? You're absolutely right. I want evidence and I will find it! And once I do Saren Arterius, there is nothing anyone can do to stop me from taking you down." Shepard declared.

"Is that a threat?" Saren growled.

"Its a fucking promise. Because you know I don't make threats."

"The Council has found no evidence of any connection between Saren and the geth. Ambassador, your petition to have him disbarred from the Spectres is denied." The asari councilor said in a soothing voice.

"I'm glad to see justice was served." Saren hissed.

He looked at Shepard one more time before his hologram disappeared. Udina was shaking in rage as the Council left their podiums.

"Why does everything go bad when you are involved!" Udina tried not to snap at her but it was getting hard to do.

"You always blame her when its not her fault Donnel and I'm getting sick and tired of it." Anderson answered crisply.

"She isn't the only one. You and Saren have too much history. It made the Council question our motives." He said after he calmed down a bit.

"I know Saren. He's working with the geth for one reason: to exterminate the entire human race." Anderson said as he looked straight at Shepard to gauge her reaction.

"Every colony we have is at risk. Every world we control is in danger. Even Earth isn't safe." He added carefully.

"Tell me about this history between you and Saren." Shepard said after she gathered herself together.

Anderson started to fidget under her intense gaze. "I worked with him on a mission a long time ago. Things went bad. Real bad." He stopped talking for a moment before continuing. "We shouldn't talk about this here. But I know what he's like. And he has to be stopped."

"If that's the case, then what's our next step?" Stepped in Ashley.

"As a Spectre, he's virtually untouchable. We need to find someway to expose him." Udina cut in.

"Well, what about, what was his name? Garrus? that C-Sec investigator?" Questioned Ashley.

"You keep surprising me Ash." Shepard looked at her wide eyed.

Ashley dismissed her claim with a wave of her hand.

"He was asking for more time for his report. Maybe we should talk to him." Ashley added.

Ashley turned to see Kaidan giving her a glare.

"Any idea where we could find him?" Asked Shepard as she looked at Udina with narrowed eyes.

"I have a contact in C-Sec who can help us track Garrus down. His name is Harkin." Udina said in annoyance to her attitude.

"Forget it. They suspended Harkin last month. Drinking on the job. I wont waste my time with that loser." Said Anderson angrily.

Shepard groaned. She heard of him and from the rumors he was an asshole and a complete ass grabbing jackass.

"You wont have to. I don't want the Council using your past history with Saren as an excuse to ignore anything we turn up." Udina bit out angrily. "Shepard will handle this." He said as he looked at her.

Shepard tried really hard not to just punch him.

"You cant just cut him out of the investigation." Shepard replied carefully.

"Its alright Celestine. He has a point." Anderson soothed her.

"I have to take care of business. Meet me in my office later Anderson." Udina left at that.

Anderson told her a bit about Harkin and where she could find him but he also directed her to an agent that worked for the Shadow Broker. She was intrigued by that piece of information. She asked once more about the history between him and Saren and he responded vaguely much to her disappointment. She learned a lot of humanity and their way of seeing things. Why Udina was frustrated at everything. She asked about the Spectres and he answered what he knew.

"Spectre's aren't made. They are born."

She liked that saying. It made her smile and stand proudly. Nihlus saw in her that she was born to be a Spectre as well as her brother. Suddenly she wanted to make Nihlus' last wish come true. She wanted to make Anderson and her parents proud of her. Her eyes were determined at helping humanity be something bigger.

'_Yes… I will make all of you proud.'_

Was her last thought as she walked down the stairs and to the elevator.

Translations:

_Geai Bleu. → Blue Jay. (In french)_

_Parvulum. → Little One. (In Classic Latin)_


End file.
